My Love Note
I recieved I lovely love note today from my husband. It was drawn on the kids Etcha-sketch.
I have awoken in a sea of hand picked petals as a teenager- (he actually snuck in my room), to countless other things...and yet even though the days of rosepetals seem lost in the midst of the diapers, stuffed animals, dolls, and playdough...he still tries!
He is a hopeless romantic ;)



Sova-Grace looking at her India pictures

Always Room for More

A few nights ago putting Sova-Grace to bed:

"Mom, Sova needs more kids."

me: "you need more kids?"

Sova scooched over against the wall and said, "see, more kids could fit in my bed" she then throws down 2 stuffed animals but grabs her doll tight. "mommy, theres lots and lots of kids at 'dede's room...All the kids!" her eyes bulging (Dede is the pre- K staff woman in the orpahnage...from 8-4 Sova was w/ her and 20 other 3 - 4 year olds in a small room)

me: "you want mommy to go get some of the kids in Dede's room?"

"No...Daddy go get the kids...Sova stay home w/ mommy...
mommy, no presents in India...all the kids-no presents" shaking her head sadly.

me (after running to the video camera to record this conversation!:
"how many kids do you want to come live w/ us?"

Sova: after looking over her bed space "4 kids mom"
after seeing my eyes grow large she continued on and on, "mom, Sova share her jammys, Sova share her dolls, Sova share her toothbrush, Sova share her butterfly wings..."
It went on and on. SHe even suggested that Dede can come too and told me that I should share my jammy's w/ her :)

She then said, "Mommy, go get Sunita..Sunita has no mommy and daddy!"
I told her Sunita DOES have a mommy and daddy -that are coming to get her soon (because I really know this) but she didnt understand and and repeated, "no, mommy! Sunita- NO mommy no daddy!"
I was at a loss for words...so we prayed together for all the children in Dede's room.
She was fine after that small emotional uprising.

SHe simply stuns me. SHe is so greatful for everything- she always says, "mommy, thank you for cooking me food."
I love it that she talks about India often. While cooking or eating she will always comment, "No icecubes in India," 'No cherrios, no waffles in India" "no jeans, no tights, no dolls." It's kind of rare when something does strike a similariy- such as our soft tortialla's on taco night- she got quite excited about those and said, "Sova eat this in India house!"
Im hoping that by continuing to pray for the kids in the orphanage and talking about India as often as we do...this will keep her spirit sensitive, generous, and caring- qualities that already exist in her.
I found her sleeping like this after our conversation..notice the dolls tucked in on her pillow.

Dreaming in English

I love looking at my sleeping children. I used to do it alot more in the 'quieter days of old' when was I was less exhausted at night...
But every now and then I just sit and stare at them and that of course usually leads to the desperate prayers of a mother comeing forth as I imagine them growing up and getting married and choosing life's various path's.

Sova-Grace now dreams in Enghlish...meaning: she mumbles in her sleep alot and and we used to not understand her- it was in Oriyan...now when she talks in her sleep it's English...it looks like she completely transitioned over :)
She still insists upon wraping her arms around whoever is putting her to bed that night. She clings tightly and stares into our face- I watch those huge eyes stareing into mine, just centimeters away, blinking hard to fight off the sleep. It may sound stange but I am not over the fact that this little girl is finnaly here. I like to lay there and take in all that God has orchestrated to get her here. The fact that He knew her while she was forming in her birth mother's womb and protected her in her infancy-saving her life from the dangerous and posibly deadly streets...here she is...cozy and warm with her arms around me...It blows my mind to think of how far away she was and how much she went through in her few years of life. She is a permant reminder in my life of the many things that God stands for.